8-Bit Twilight Eclipse Interactive

This is surprisingly amazing. Try it even if you dislike Twilight :o

Databases and EOE

It's been a while since I worked on the new version of EOE. Interviews and school sort of took over my time. Now going back to it and looking at the code I realize how oriented around databases it is.

I don't know when it happened, but apparently I'm a database developer now. The majority of my interviews were for jobs that primarily involved database work. Whether it was ADO.NET or PHP with MySQL, I got interviews for it. I suppose I shouldn't be that surprised, I've been working with databases for years, it's just odd how I sort of fell into it without realizing.

On a side note, after this Wednesday I should have time to work on EOE and get back into the OO code. Right now I got to build another class for listings and my mind just doesn't want to wrap around it because of my assignments that are due.

Once I get the listing class done and implement the listings the rest of the site should finish quickly. I wanted to get the listing class done before I finish with profile deletion because I want to run a check to see if that profile has listings. That way I can run through various tests without issue.

I sort of can't wait for the completion of the site. It's going to be the most user-oriented site I've coded, and I plan for it to only be the beginning. I want to create sites that can handle a lot of user generated content, it's sort of one of my main goals to do for 2010.

And I'm hoping once I switch to wordpress I can start writing more formal posts, perhaps have a separate section of like articles or deep thoughts/opinions. That way the site has a lot more reading appeal then me just talking about various TV shows and vague descriptions about my websites. Haha.

Unable To Relax

I've been thinking over some stuff lately and I realized that I'm sort of unable to relax. At least when it comes to school.

I'm always thinking what I need to do for school. If something is due in 2-3 weeks I'm still trying to sort out when to work on it. I can never stop thinking about the looming assignments or the date of midterms and finals. I don't really stop to think that I have extra time to concentrate on other things like my stories or websites.

Perhaps this is why I feel like I'm constantly busy... Albeit my schedule is pretty full but I do have more downtime then I realize. Now that I'm procrastinating a little on things I'm starting to realize that I'm not really procrastinating, I'm just planning out WAY too much time for what I want to do.

I need to find a good balance between thinking about school and thinking about side projects. Because now even as I type this I'm still thinking about my Calculus assignment due Thursday.

BAH

Wordpress

I've been messing around with various blogging tools for a while now and I think this blog move over to wordpress permanently. It'll give me a chance to learn how to properly create themes and not to mention it means this site will be hosted back on my host instead of on the google servers.

Mostly I just want to learn how to make themes, and think it will make sense the larger the blog becomes.

So my web development plan for the next month or so will consist of:

a.) Moving to wordpress and creating my first theme.
b.) EOE Version 2 which I will be moving over to http://eoe.onlyakiss.net instead of skys-content.com

Then after that I'm going to tackle the new skys-content.com which will be user oriented graphics site that allows various people to upload their graphics. And once that's set up I'll be creating a php app to make managing graphics/resources easy.

Alright. Sleep time. Ciao.

Layout?

So blogger just released a new Template Designer and I thought I'd try it out. For people who don't know much about web it has a lot of options and is easy to use. I figured that I'd keep this one up until I have time to make one myself. Which will hopefully be sometime later in the week. My Monday is killer but after that it's smooth sailing.

Some small notes:

I watched the whole first season of Glee. I don't really understand the hysteria around it. It's a good show but not AMAZING.

I found I'm slowly using my Ubuntu more and more. The only reason I'm on my windows right now is to edit an essay for English.

I've been playing BioShock 1 finally and all I can think about now is "Would you kindly?" like all the time. Omg.

True Blood Season 3 starts tonight! I'm so excited! :D!!!

That's about it for the small notes. TTYL.

From my iPod

This post is going to typed entirely on my iPod touch :o

I've had a busy week. 4 assignments and a midterm in about an hour. So I've spent a good amount of my time studying in the library, and I just think it's weird how you can sit around people for hours on end and not once ever talk or get to know them. Well sometimes you talk to them but about 99% of the time you don't.

It's interesting how so many people can sit in such close proximity of each other and never even look at each other.

Impossible Amount of Work

Have you ever felt like you had an impossible amount of work to complete within a specific time line? That's how I feel right now... I have no clue how I'm going to survive this upcoming week, I barely think I can survive Sunday without not finishing something...

Next week I have 3 assignments, CS 245 due Tuesday, CS 240 Wednesday and MATH 138 Thursday. A midterm on Thursday AND an interview on Monday. So far I've started the assignments due Tuesday and Thursday and started to study for my midterm.

Tomorrow (Sunday) is going to be essay and interview preparation day as I have to write a first draft of an Essay for 11:59pm Sunday night. Then on Monday I have my interview right after class, following the completion of my CS 246 assignment before 6pm. Then Monday night, Tuesday and Wednesday is various assignment work and midterm studying.

It feels like no matter how much I think through what to do, or how much I plan I'm going to implode come Thursday night. Unfortunately, if I do implode I need to pick myself up on the weekend as I have a midterm the following Monday...

...

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I need to go watch Gilmore Girls to calm myself down...

Driving and Stories

I feel like I should change the timezone on my blogger so the time on blog posts aren't always after midnight...

So now that I've gotten my license I've been driving to school everyday. It's about a 30-40 minute drive one way depending if I decide to go speed limit or a little faster (;P). Meaning I'm in the car for over an hour each day and I've observed somethings.

For instance, I know why my Dad says it's nicer to drive in the States then here because everyone is road raging or impatient. I can't count the number of times I've seen people turning left and a car crossing the intersection had to stop/slow down. Including once where I was making a right turn and a car across from me felt the need to rush their left turn, forcing me to stop completely even though I had the right of way.

[/rant]

On another note I've decided to write Consequence, the book I plan to publish in first person from two different points of view. Third person albeit gives you all the views on a story usually lacks an emotional component. It's going to be interesting considering the two characters I've chosen are a.) male, and b.) have completely different personalities then me. So we'll see how that goes :p

Also, I've been working on Inner Demons, a short story based off a dream I had last December. Once it's done I'll be sure to post a link here so you guys can read it.

And lastly I've been engrossed by the youtube band ALLCAPS. Their songs are dance nerdy goodness. It's awesome.

Dilemmas....

I feel like I already had a post named Dilemmas... or something close. *Checks* Apparently not.

Anyways so my dilemma is Sky's Content planning is completely done. I can't really deviate from what's there. If I do it's just another way to get to some main plot points. So now that I have it all planned out I feel less of an urge to write it...

Previously this wouldn't be an issue because Sky's Content was always changing, but the thing is, it hasn't changed all that much since last Fall. Even with the (out of nowhere) break up the ending is still the same. It's just going to take about 10 chapters to get to where they were supposed to be in 5.

This always seems to happen when I'm done planning out at a story. Once it's plotted I feel like it's done, and I don't need to worry about it anymore. I guess it's because so much more effort and planning is done then actual writing.

For Sky's Content alone there has been at least 10 various plot lines and sequences that I ended up scrapping (probably more I no longer remember). Specifically for when Yuri is house bound after her accident. There is about 3 or 4 chapters worth that I never wrote. And some of it I really rather enjoyed, like the original way Yuri cut her hand. Or the origins behind the flower and note on Shikamaru's bed. Those were so epic and awesome but it just... didn't make the cut.

OH and not to mention the first way Shikamaru's mom found out about them was so horribly cute and romantic. And I mean HORRIBLY cute. Like you would read it and literally go 'AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW' with the jaw dropping and everything. Perhaps I should post about it sometime...

But alas, back to the dilemma of not feeling the urge to write it. I think I just need to get over Yuri's whole brooding period and it will pick up. Trust me I know how annoying and stupid she was in chapter 16. That's because she hasn't gotten her way in two years and is frustrated out of her mind. Which in turn makes me frustrated for having to write that because I have to go through every emotion and thought she has.

Gah, so annoying...

I Need A Bigger Room

When I was away on my work term the past few months the room I had where I was staying was a lot bigger then my room at home. Now that I'm back in school and in my room at home, I'm quickly realizing I've completely outgrown the space.

I have way too many books. I'm stashing them anywhere I can find: behind my TV, on some random shelf in the corner, etc. And I just ordered some more manga online knowing that I have nowhere to put them. Well technically I DO, but I like to display my manga and my display shelves are now full.

I suppose I can empty out my random cables/computer shelf but that would only temporarily solve the problem...

AND not only is the problem with my manga, it's with my closet too. Not to sound too much like a girl, but my closet is WAY too small. I would say about half of my clothes are in the closet the rest are somewhere around the house in hampers or in the basement.

I need more space x_X

Dexter

I've been re-watching Dexter the past few days and man is it still just as good as when I first saw it. I remember I started to watch Dexter because I heard the season 4 finale was crazy. I didn't know ANYTHING about Dexter until I started to watch the first episode. About 5 minutes into the first episode when Dexter was so enticed by the body without blood I was hooked.

Initially I was amazed at Dexter's character. There's very little shows where a bad guy headlines as the protagonist. I thought it was amazing that they could take such a dark and twisted person and make him so relatable.

Then the more I watched it I just got carried away by the episodes. Before I knew it it was 5-6am and I finished season 1 in one night. I tweeted about this the other day, but there's something really calming about a good show so early in the morning. Just letting yourself stop thinking and let the story guide you. I just love feelings you get: anxiety, happiness, sadness, etc. All because you just let the story take control over your life for a few hours when everything else is calm and quiet.

So AWESOME! Perhaps this is appealing to me so much because of the story teller in me. I don't know many people who would sit in bed for the whole day marathoning multiple seasons of a TV Show. But god is it awesome.

<333

One Year

It's interesting how much your life can change in one year. It's hard to believe that it's been a year of blogging already! Well it's almost, I think I started this on the 24th. Regardless I just can't believe how different things are now then they were last May 22.

This time last year was hell for me. I was in a bad place for a really long time and I finally feel like I'm getting out of it. I still remember the exact days everything happened. April 24th, the day after my last exam I found out my cat, Rosco was going to die. After I found out I knew my other cat Felix was going to go soon after, but on June 5th I found out he was going to die from cancer, not from grief. Then on June 30th my grandfather died. On July 17 we put Rosco down and on July 23rd, 6 days later we put Felix down.

God it so weird talking about it. In the past year I've kept repeating it in my head over and over, the various numbers. How close each of them were to one another.

Ironically, something from the Private Practice season finale really got to me that sort of relates to this. In the finale when Dell found out he had another brain bleed he was telling Betsy, his daughter, not to be sad because everything bad that was ever going to happen to her already happened in such a short time. So nothing could ever be worse.

I don't really know what more I can say without being too personal. I'm all for being more open in blogs but I think there's a point where it's too much.

I just wanted to say mostly that I was in a bad place and a lot of things suffered because of it. And now a year later all I can do now is try to make up for everything I've let slide since then. It's still hard to believe just how different in mentality and just being I am now as opposed to then. I obviously still have my issues, everyone does, but I'm different now. Hopefully for the better.

Things Always Get in the Way

It seems like no matter how difficult or how much work you have, it always piles up on you at some point. I'm three weeks into school this year and the amount of work I have in comparison to last term is significantly smaller. Yet, I still feel like I never have enough time to do anything.

The only real difference I can say about this term and last term is that I can work and stuff last minute this term if I REALLY needed to and it would be okay. Last term if I last minute-ed anything I was eaten alive by the work. Then again, last term there was so much to do that I was pretty much eaten alive regardless -__-

The excuse for why I feel like this now is that I actually have time to work on side projects. In the back of my mind I have all these projects I want to work on but can't because of my school work. I am DYING to continue work on the new EOE but can't because I have an English test, Calculus assignment and Programming assignment due this week...

Ultimately, there is no way in hell anyone can get everything they ever want to accomplish completed (unless they're super crazy smart and a workaholic). So I guess all we can do is just concentrate on prioritizing.

:S

(EDIT: And let me point out that when you are reading an article that you have no interest in whatsoever, all the other things you can do keep popping up in your mind. Taunting you with their vaguely interesting topics.)

Web stuff!

So I've spent the past week or so preparing my websites and stuff for applying to jobs. To be more specific I've spent the past 3 days working on the new and improved EOE. For those of you who don't know, EOE is my website directory. I'm redoing the whole thing pretty much from scratch.

The new EOE will no longer only contain graphics/resources. It will also include blogs, tutorial sites, portfolios, etc. There will be a new and improved user system. The user will have a profile where they can edit their information, and from there they can control the listings under their user name (meaning you can have more than one site listed!). And the new login system should be automated so you can sign up, receive a confirmation e-mail and activate your account. Also, the top views will actually work properly. You shouldn't be able to refresh a page and increase the views anymore.

On the backend side of things I plan to make my own admin panel to make my life easier. Including a mass e-mailing system.

SO, that's the plan. In the past few days I've completed the new layout, set up the databases, and got the logging in with encrypted passwords to work. Since I restructured the entire site, the initial set up took a little longer.

That's about it! Back to work!

Procrastination

So I've been trying to find a way to procrastinate on my work report. Turns out I procrastinating on my work report with other school work... And now basically the school work needed to finish before my work report is due is done. I even did a bunch of Calculus that isn't due until a week from now.

*Realizes CS 246 assignment is posted and goes to do it then realizes Marmoset isn't accepting submissions yet*

Le sigh.

Creepy...

So I was messing around with makeup and decided to take some pictures with my camera phone. Despite getting a lot of good pictures there are a few that are just plain creepy... Creepy in the sense that they look sort of really anime like o_O

Basically, my camera has this sketch effect which makes your face look "drawn". Because of the way my makeup was... well... just see for yourself.






I don't know why I posted this... I just thought that I should share the photos because as creepy as it is, it's sort of cool o_O

NaNoWriMo

I talk about Sky's Content way too much. For those of you who don't know what it is, my blog posts must seem really boring. But basically this blog is about how I plan to finish it!

I've been thinking about it and I've been writing the story for too long. Since December 25, 2006 to be exact. So it is now my official goal to get it done before the end of the year. To be more specific, if it is not done by November, I will join NaNoWriMo just to get it done.

If you were around me last November, you would have known how much I desperately wanted to join in on NaNoWriMo but couldn't because of school. So I figured since this year I will be working in the month of November, I have no excuse not to do it.

(FYI NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month in which authors everywhere try to write a 50 000 word novel in a month. Or in my case, it will be trying to finish Sky's Content in a month.)

I have come to this conclusion mainly because I've been concentrating on what happens in Sky's Content AFTER the story is actually supposed to be over. I've spent the most of the past week thinking about and all the little details that are going to happen. And although it's really fun to think about, I realize I need to move on to my other stories.

So even though it will be hectic, NaNoWriMo here I come! It's going to be awesome :)

Shikamaru Nara

I can't really explain my infatuation over him, it's sort of odd... And I say infatuation mainly because I like him A LOT for no apparent reason.

When I first started to watch Naruto about 7 years ago (it's hard to believe it's 7 years, but it is o_o) he didn't really stick out to me. He was just sort of a background character in my mind. In fact that only real thing I remember about Shikamaru from the beginning was when he was talking to pakkun...

But then Sky's Content happened and everything changed o_o

Sky's Content was sort of a random story. I had just finished my Kakashi fan fiction and wanted to write one on a less popular Naruto character. If I remember right, I had it narrowed down between Shikamaru and Kiba. I don't know why I picked Shikamaru over Kiba, but I'm glad I did. Because as I started to think up new scenarios of Shikamaru and Yuri it quickly became my favourite thing to do. It's literally like my default thought when I have nothing to think about.

Now, Shikamaru has WAY surpassed Kakashi as my favourite character. Which makes a lot of sense considering his character. I've researched his character inside and out. I either know WAY too much about him, or know NOTHING because of all the research.

Regardless though, he's still my favourite character, and I will be forever on the quest of a good looking Shikamaru plushie because of that.

Connections

Lately I've been sort of in my own world. Sort of pulling away from everyone; just being solitary. And as I'm in my own world I got to thinking about how our lives are a series of connections. Everything we do is defined on how we interact with others, the connections we make with them. Because ultimately that's what pushes us forward. Whether the connection is a best friend, or just a random person you ride the bus with, that is essentially your life.

Sort of annoying considering it's one of the only ways to measure your life. Whether the connections you have with someone are good or bad, strong or barely there, it's a connection.

For example, today I was explaining to my mom today about the War of the Currents and how Tesla and Edison basically attacked each other's characters and hurt a lot of animals/people to prove their points(i.e. Edison killing Topsy the Elephant with AC current). And if you think about it, the fact that I know about the War of the Currents is in fact a connection. Granted, it's a weak one, but it's through knowing their contributions for the world that they is still connected to all of us.

Which means for someone like me, who sort of dislikes talking to people, the world sort of really sucks...

But then who is to say this is really a bad thing? Isn't it amazing, that human beings as a species are so connected? Like think about it, you could potentially meet the most important person in your entire life tomorrow. Or you could meet your most hated enemy... But the potential of the connection is the most important thing to consider. Connections are high in number and always existent, whether we want them to be there or not.

So I guess in the end, what we decide to do with these connections is really up to us.

Reading

Lately I've been reading a lot of books. I finally finished The Time Traveler's Wife and Bran Hambric. Two books I started about mid last year... And then I read Shiver in about 3 days. Now my plan is start reading Beastly, followed by Wuthering Heights.

I was thinking about why I've been doing so much reading and I realized it's because I need to stop thinking about my stories. I need to get caught up in a world that's not created or altered by myself and just go with it. Granted, I love my characters, but sometimes I just need to get away. Haha.

Plus I find that buying books is one of the things I go and do when I'm upset. It has the same effect as chocolate or ice cream. Well actually, not so much ice cream anymore, but that's another story.

The only thing is I'm running out of space for my books. Between text books, manga, and regular books there is virtually no space in my room for it. I think it's time I finally get a bookshelf/shelves.

So I'm off to go put a band aid on and maybe start some of Beastly. See ya~

Sky's Content - End of Part 1

So my last blog about Sky's Content was right after chapter 12, the "Time to Wake Up" chapter. I thought I'd do another blog explaining all the chapters since then, and little extra things that I thought would be interesting to know.

Alright, chapter 13 "Rainy Days". When I started this chapter, I originally wanted to put it on the end of chapter 12 instead of the doing the BBQ. But then as I was writing it, I realized it was going to be much longer than I anticipated. Thus, I decided to expand it to one full chapter.

I knew that Shikamaru and Yuri needed to go through their first 'fight'. And I thought Yuri's extreme clingyness was probably a good excuse for it. I tried to concentrate on how the fight brought them closer. I purposely mirrored the actions before and after the fight just show how quickly they could over the 'small' things. I say 'small' because even though Yuri has an extreme breakdown, neither of them is really phased by it afterwards.

Chapter 14, like many chapters sort of came out of nowhere. I didn't want Yuri's uncle to be just a small side character; I wanted him to be someone who pushes her to be a better a person. Sort of like a proper father in the absence of Suisen. Not to mention, Ryu is actually going to have a significant part in the latter half of Part 2, so I couldn't just introduce him all half assed.

Also, I feel like I need to point out the fact that Shikamaru willingly goes along with Ryu for most of the chapter. Shikamaru and Ryu actually get along pretty well, despite their first meeting. This of course, will be expanded upon when Ryu returns in about 8 or so chapters.

And now chapter 15. I had all of Shikamaru's point of view done and written with the full intention of Yuri saying yes to him. She was originally going to stay in Kohona and I had the rest of the story all planned. I was so used to the idea that Yuri would say yes to him, just for fun I thought of 'What if she said no?' Then I got inspired and ideas just started to come in bulk, making the plot about 10000x more better.

And although the plot was so much better, It honestly really upset me that the end of part 1 went the way it did. Especially having to go through Yuri's point of view in which she is so feeling oriented. If I remember correctly I cried as I was writing it out T_T Gaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

And making chapter 15 the end of part 1 was sort of a last minute decision. I just really wanted part 2 to be able to sort of stand on its own. Sort of reinventing how Shikamaru and Yuri meet and how they get back to together. Before, I had it stuck in my head that they were this unbreakable item and it honestly made the story lose part of it's luster. But now that they were broken up this whole world of different possibilities emerged and I couldn't really continue straight from part 1.

Lastly! The beginning of part 2: chapter 16. I had such a reluctance to write chapter 16, even though it had been planned out for months. (Even before I finished chapter 15.) Just the idea of having to write Yuri in a world without Shikamaru was so abhorring. Then I started writing it with my new absolution of writing in third person and it just didn't come out right at all. It felt so forced; so I redid it all in Yuri's perspective and it just flowed so much easier.

Stylistically this chapter took FOREVER because I was just trying to concentrate so hard on the things about Yuri that were different. For example, the way she thinks now is completely different; she controls her thoughts to the point where it's almost brainwashing. For the majority of the chapter Shikamaru's name alone is so taboo to her it sends chills up her spine. That is until she sees him and all goes to hell, lol.

So now on 17, I still need to concentrate on the fact that Yuri is trying to control the thoughts of Shikamaru... And how she's horribly failing. :p That's all for spoilers.

Alright, I'm going to bed...

P.S. You might be wondering if Ryu has such an important part in part 2, how did I know that before part 2 even existed. The latter half of part 2 was what I was originally planning on writing, it just got pushed back to AFTER they got back together :)

P.P.S. Oh damn, I just spoiled that Shikamaru and Yuri get back together! Well... it's sort of obvious anyways. Haha.

Ok. Night.

ACTUAL Epic Post

Ok, so I guess a true blogger would explain instead of just telling. And after Warren complained I decided to try to write an actual epic blog post about this. Although I have no clue how epic it will be as I will try not to get too personal.

So basically, I've switched out of Software Engineering and into Computer Science, and I decided to switch for two main reasons:

a.) I REALLY want an English minor. Writing is so important to me and SE just wouldn't let me have the room I would want for the minor. Even now in CS with more room I am probably going to need to take a 6th course here and there. In SE I would have definitely needed a 6th course each term, perhaps even 7 for one or two. >_>

b.) I need to start concentrating on other personal stuff instead of constantly dealing with school. Whenever I think about last term I just think about how my life was entirely school. That's literally everything I did for four months. And there are some things in my life that I've been ignoring that I can't anymore.

Really, I'm just glad to be done with the constant e-mails and stress that I got from all of this. I started sending e-mails about this in 2009. And just literally the other day I was finally put into CS Co-op.

It was a long and horrible process. Mainly because during enrollment my transfer still hadn't completed and I couldn't enroll in a lot of the courses I needed. In the end it turned out that I couldn't enroll in 2 classes because I didn't have the pre-requisites, and the other 3 I wanted were full. Thus, when I COULD enroll I was literally checking every 5-10 minutes for spots to open up in the classes I wanted. SOMEHOW I managed to get all the classes I wanted and have the schedule I had planned out from the beginning. It's a miracle, I know.

The unfortunate part is I need to take Calculus 2 and Logic in the same term. My two worse marks in all of University so far... We'll see how that goes I guess... o_o

BUT THE BEST PART IS, AFTER THIS TERM NO MORE PDENG! Yyyyeeeeeeesssssss. Sure I got to take PD, but once I pass PDEng 25 all I need is 2 more PD credits. That means I somehow cheated the system and I get two work terms free from Professional Development <3

AMAZING!

EPIC POST!

I switched out of Software Engineering.

I am now a Computer Science student.

Fin

New Years Resolutions?

So after seeing Angela do a recap and set new goals for the month I decided to go through my resolutions and see how I'm doing.

1. Write at least 1000 words daily until Sky's Content is complete (not including editing days).

Well as of right now I am technically writing a 1000 words almost daily. Just not in Sky's Content. Considering how much I'm writing for assignments and blogs and how many times I had to fix up SC 16. Overall, I'm making somewhat good progress on this resolution.

2. Finish an old video game that I haven't played yet once every two weeks.

*Cough cough* ... Yeah...

3. Complete version 1 of at least one of my web applications by the end of this work term.

Right now no real progress has been made in any of the web apps I wanted. But I'm starting to learn ASP.NET for a WORK web app... Although I'm thinking of creating that organizer I wanted for a long time in ASP.NET as practice. So it's getting there.

4. Have the site redesigns done by the end of February.

*Cough cough cough cough cough* Well, I had started a template, but I decided to scrap it. And now I have a sketch for a new template so that'll hopefully get done!

5. Blog at least twice a week.

Ah ha! Success! At least I'm keeping up fully with one of my goals :D

So to update this list, I will try to:

• Write at least 500 words daily ON Sky's Content until it is complete (not including editing days).
• Finish Fatal Frame sometime within the next few weeks (as I predict my life at work getting very busy this next week)
• Complete version 1 of at least one web app before May (Nothing new there)
• Have at least one site redesigned by end of March
• Keep blogging twice a week!

PS: I'm going to lie and say this was posted March 2nd, instead of March 1st because my layout breaks when I post twice in a day :(

Dreams

Dreams as in, life goals, not so much the dreams you have at night.

I was thinking about how happy I was to finish to Sky's Content chapter 16, and how style wise it was my favourite. I was tempted for so long to just half ass it so I could get to the parts where I like. But I'm glad I didn't because it really forced to me to improve on my style.

But now that I think about it, one of my ultimates goal in life is to publish a book. Not to self publish, because that sort of feels like cheating to me... Because the actual process of finding an agent, finding a publisher and actually succeeding is what I look forward to the most. Probably I'll regret these words when I actually start writing millions of agent queries and have my self-esteem blown away when no one wants me. It's just, I know how HARD it is, but I'm excited just to try.

Now I just need to get a manuscript of my book done... lol. But I have plenty of years before I think I'm getting too old to publish a book. There is just so much for me to learn and do before I can even think of publishing. But I'm excited. :D

The World Has It Shine

Aside from my internet horribly failing the past two days I've been trying to figure out what to blog about aside from the epic post that I am going to post in maybe a week.

And I thought I'd blog about this one song that I love; it's the first song I always play when I turn on my ipod these days and it's because of a few lines.

Before I met you
I used to dream you up and make you up in my mind (up in my mind)
Woah-oh.
And all I ever wanted
Was to be understood.
You've been the only one who could.
I could never turn my back on you.

More specifically, I like the first two lines the most. I don't really know why. I guess it reminds me a lot of the one short story I worked on in 2006. The one named 'The Other Voice Inside My Head'. I think one of these days I'm going to re-write it because I don't really think I gave it the full attention that it needed.



Anyways, that's about this for this blog. Really I just wanted to have others listen to the song, lol.

In Their Own World

ZOMG! TWO POSTS IN ONE DAY??!? SO UNPRECEDENTED! Well technically the Saturday post was on Sunday but somehow my layout breaks if I have two posts in the same day. I don't know how, but it does.

Anyways, I thought I'd blog about this really quick because it's something I put some serious thought into the past day or so. There's this part in Sky's Content I've been thinking about a lot lately and last night I sort of realized something. When Yuri and Shikamaru are together, they're sort of in their own world. Everyone else around them doesn't really matter.

And because I was thinking about this last night (or this morning, I can't remember) before I went to sleep I had a dream which was similar to this idea.

Basically the dream was about this guy I used to really like, and how when he was with this one girl, him and her were sort of in their own world. And I was watching them as they gave each other this sort of look, the one that really says 'I'm in love with you'. Then some other stuff happened in the dream which involved me running away, plotting their breakup and eating this ice cream that was WAY too big to eat and have it melting in my hands...

The weirdest thing about this, is when I woke up it sort of really bothered me how jealous I got from it. But oh well, the dream helped to turn a 2D character from Sky's Content to a 3D one for me. So now some chapters will probably be a little different. Yay for a continually changing story!

Also, for the small amount of readers I have, do you like that I've been doing smaller, more frequent blogs? Or preferred it when my blogs were longer?

Conversations

Earlier this week I realized something about myself. I have never had a deep and meaningful conversation with someone in person. That's not to say I haven't had deep conversations, but they've all been online or on the phone. And if I'm in a conversation in person that could get deep I tend to duck out of the conversation somehow, coming up with any excuse. That or I just keep quiet and avoid eye contact.

I guess this is a part of the 'meh'-ness that I typically exude in person. But I just find it odd that after so many years, MSN is still my main line of communication with people. If I want to have a serious conversation with someone, I go to MSN to talk to them. Even now. Perhaps that's why I don't really go on MSN anymore. To avoid the deep conversations...

I want to say I'm like this because of my writing, and that I can more easily express myself on paper/on the computer. But I was like this even before I started writing, so I don't really know why I'm like this. I guess I'm just a victim of the internet?

It's just really odd. Especially since I've had multiple people tell me I'm a lot more open on my blog then real life... When did writing become my main form of communication? Gosh, the conundrums.

Anyways, so on Thursday I bought the cutest thing ever. Gizmo from Gremlins <3 Omg. SO CUTE!

Oh and that epic post is still pending. But I don't really know how epic it will be... Ok. I'm going to go edit Sky's Content 16 some more. BYE.

Working Space

After two weeks of being away from home I realized something. When I am at home I am very, very unproductive. In fact, I do so little that I probably can do more in two hours at my apartment then I can do in one weekend at home. Then again, I sort of attribute this to the fact that my room hasn't been fully clean since about... well... since I got my TV last May.

So in preparation for next school term I plan to make my room a place where I can come and study with ease. I am going to clean it thoroughly and get rid of any junk I do not use. This includes cleaning out my closet, a feat that hasn't been done in about 5+ years. I'm going to try to move around/remove furniture so I can fit another desk in here, if not then remove enough junk that I'll have lots of shelf space. And lastly, I am going to remove about 3/4 of the posters off my walls to help the transition into a 'work' environment.

Removing the anime/videogame/movie posters on my walls and door is a pretty deal for me, considering they've been up for years (at least 6 years for some). But after last school term I know that I need to change in so many ways, and I feel like removing the posters will have a big hand in that. I really just want to let go of the past Karol who these posters represent, and allow room for the new Karol who I hope I will slowly transition into as these next few months pass by.

Once I finally get a working space I just have to concentrate on not getting distracted by the beauty that is cable TV. But I'll worry about that later. Right now all I'm really concerned about is getting this room clean for the first time in almost a year! (And the fact that my room at my apartment also needs cleaning... -_-)

Happy Valentine's Day!

It's weird saying Happy Valentine's Day and actually meaning it since I'm usually so indifferent to the holiday. Even on years when I did happen to have a boyfriend it didn't really have much meaning to me. But now I feel like Valentine's day is more about your stance on the holiday as opposed to anything else. Everyone needs to either hate it, love it, or in most people's cases refuse to even acknowledge it.

I'm trying to think of this like if instead of Valentine's day, people felt this way about Mother's Day (or Father's Day). And it all just seems silly after that. It's like saying just because Mother's Day only applies to mothers you should boycott it. That it makes all the people without mothers feel horrible and the people with mothers have to go through the trouble to getting them gifts and planning out this whole day because they're there. Like, these holidays aren't mean to single anyone out, it's to show your appreciation for them if you have them.

So those who have someone to spend Valentine's day with, enjoy it! Not because it's Valentine's Day, but because you would be bored otherwise if your significant other wasn't there. And for those who don't have anyone like myself... Well... WRITE BLOG POSTS! Haha, no, but just enjoy it like it was any other day. There's no reason to get stressed out about not being in a relationship. Like honestly, who wants to get into a relationship with someone just so they're not alone on Valentine's Day? If you're going to get into a relationship with someone, it should be so you wouldn't need to feel the need to celebrate it just on Valentine's Day, but on any day.

Staying In Character

One of the things I've been struggling the most with the past couple of days is trying to figure out what would be the 'Shikamaru' thing to do. Now that the first draft of Sky's Content 16 is nearing completion I started to think more in depth about what happens in the later chapters.

My main concern is that I've concentrated too much on the story I want to tell and not the story that would happen if Shikamaru were to be placed in these events. This is something I've always struggled within the story, especially the chapters in Shikamaru's perspective.

Usually when I try to get into Shikamaru's head I go online and re-read all his profiles on any wiki I can find. And even though I've probably read those same profiles about 15-20 times by now I'm always learning something new about him I didn't know before. Like this time when I went through the profiles, I picked up a little bit on how he feels about female ninjas. As one of the profiles stated, "He feels that men, like him, should be the ones protecting [women] and not the other way around."

Potential 'spoiler' below, if you want to read, highlight the text. (It doesn't give any plot away though, so I wouldn't really count it as a spoiler.)

Now learning this I learned one key thing that actually affects the story: if a girl (aka Yuri) were to refuse being protected he would wonder why and still try to protect her. Sure it seems minor but it sort of changes the way some parts of the story will progress.

And then this got me thinking about the latest Naruto chapter and how Sasuke sacrifices Karin because the second she was taken hostage she was a 'burden'. When I read that it really stuck out to me because of the numerous times I've used the word 'burden' in Sky's Content. Then I realized just how different Shikamaru and Sasuke's characters are. Like, right now Sasuke wants nothing more than to destroy Kohona, and Shikamaru would easily give his life up to protect the village.

Anyways, enough of my ramblings. I know probably in a few weeks/months I'll be looking up Shikamaru's character again, trying to get into his head. Sky's Content is so much mental effort. Omg -_-

D.N. Angel

About an hour ago I finished the D.N. Angel anime for the second time. Originally, I watched D.N. Angel in 2004 when the series came out. And I've been meaning to watch it again for a while now because there were only two things I could remember about it: episode 6 was my favourite, and the anime seemed too short. (And I'm serious that was all I could remember. I didn't even remember that Dark stole pieces of art.)

Surprisingly after watching again those two things still hold true. I guess that's why they stuck with me so much. But there were a lot of things I noticed this time that I didn't before.

For one, as I said in a previous post. Dark and Risa's age differences is a little weird. Like Bella/Edward weird.

Another thing, in episode 18 when Riku and Daisuke told each other that they liked each other, all I could keep thinking was 'they're too young to be dating'. I guess I didn't notice it before because I was their age when I first watched it, but now, 5 years later it just seems odd watching two 14 yearolds date. And ironically enough, I was 14 when I started dating. Sort of makes me feel old...

Also, does anyone else think it's odd that Daisuke's father was gone for 12 years and when he came back it like he was gone a day? I don't know, it just feels like they should have been more 'Wtf were you doing all this time? We sort of needed you.' and less of 'Welcome back! Want some coffee?' But I guess when you only have 26 episodes you sort of have no choice but to leave some plot holes.

When I think of the series overall, the first half of it was a big mess of introductions and random crap, while the second half seemed to be all plot and story. Which is why I still think the anime ended too soon as it feels like they were planning on going for more than 26 episodes but were cut off and had to conclude the series in 2 episodes. I just don't see why they would go into so much detail about Freedert and the Second Hand of Time if they weren't planning on have the series go longer.

But I'm sort of glad they went into all that detail with Freedert because it was probably the most meaningful part of the series. When Elliot's sword stabbed Freedert I had to stop for a moment and just think. The sword stabbing her would have finally killed her but it allowed her to be with Elliot. The symbolism in that was very striking.

In the end, all I'm left thinking is that I want the story to continue. I want more of the phantom thief Dark and I want to actually hear the full story. So I'm reading the manga! Which I guess this is a good time to start reading now that the hiatus is over, but it means I have a lot of reading ahead of me.

Overall, D.N. Angel was an okay series. Not as good as I thought it was simply because they didn't have enough episodes to get the full story in.

Epic Post...

...To Come at an Undisclosed Date in the Very Near Future.

So there's been something that I've been dying to blog about. But I don't really want to blog about it until it's official and there is absolutely no turning back. Which should be very soon. Approximately 2 weeks.

In the meantime I'm going to talk about three things: 1.) Blogging. 2.) Programmming. and 3.) Sky's Content.

For the longest time I was the only one I knew who blogged. I know others who posted once or twice on their blog and gave up. Or people who post once every few months with some random thing they just learned to make themselves sound more intelligent. But now it's like every one is blogging about anything and everything -_- The ratio between my friend's blog posts and mine is about 4:1 in any given week. I feel like I should be blogging more even though I've done it consistently for 9 months now. But I'm going to try to stick to my 2 - 3 posts a weeks. I don't think I could possibly come up with enough interesting topics to blog more than that.

Otherwise I've been planning the site overhauls. Right now the next thing on my list is redo-ing skys-content.com. The first thing I need to do for that is to create a new layout. And I'm not looking forward to it. The more php and programming I learn, the harder designing seems to become. The layout on this page took about 5 tries before it turned out like this. I can't even begin to imagine how long the Sky's Content layout is going to take me... Blah...

But also I've been planning the EOE redo. I've pretty much got the database stuff down, I just need to learn how to code SQL queries and how to create a proper login. Oh and I need to learn how to set up registration. I'm really itching to start that.

In the meantime I'm working through a PHP book I bought that's supposed to run you through making your own blogging system/web applications. Unfortunately, the only thing I've been able to do so far is set up LAMP due to my slow internet connection... Le Sigh.

AND LASTLY, Sky's Content.

Last night I couldn't fall asleep so I went through and thought out the rest of chapter 16. I thought it was going to be painful and annoying to think through but it actually flowed quite nicely in my brain. So much so I'm beginning to wonder how much I actually know about plants that my subconscious isn't telling me...

I would divulge more but people who read Sky's Content are reading this blog and I can't spoil anything like I used to in this blog. Well I didn't really spoil, but I would give hints like how in chapter 15 there is one paragraph that I'm so proud of because it actually sounds like it's something that Shikamaru would say. Something that embodies his character so much there's no denying that given he were in that situation, he would say that.

Anyways, *traditional exit to blog where I say I'm going to do something*

Sundays & The Website

Sundays are usually really short lived for me. I never really concentrate on the day itself but more on the fact that tomorrow is a Monday. So even though I could do so many different things on Sundays I feel like I've accomplished nothing at all simply because Monday will come and I still have something else I need to do. Blah.

Anyways, so I've been marathoning DN Angel today and yesterday and I've noticed a few things.

1. Dark is a pretty boy. So much so it's not really appealing at all. I prefer Daisuke over Dark any day.
2. It seems really weird how Risa is 14 and Dark (who is seemingly much older) is interested in her... Like sure he's interested in her because of her aunt, but still, kissing her is sort of awkward.
3. Risa and Riku are really rich. I didn't notice it the first time I watched the series but their house is HUGE. But on a side note, if they have a driver to take them to their beach house, how come they have to walk/bike to school everyday?
4. Also, Satoshi is adopted right? He has to be if his 'Dad' is 26 and he is 14..

Yeah, I'll probably notice quite a few more things before I finish. It's just weird because I watched this anime like 5 years ago and I can hardly remember anything that's happened in it.

OH AND I ALMOST COMPLETELY FORGOT TO MENTION.

If you haven't noticed the site is now hosted through blogger, so the layouts are temporarily gone. I need to set up Sky's Content to prepare for the layouts to move over there. I'm thinking of putting my icons back up as well, although I don't know how often those will be updated... Oh and I'm going to start tutorials. It's mostly going to be php stuff and cool little shortcuts you can do with your web code that I learn from time to time.

Ok, back to marathoning for me. BYE

Goals

Whether they're daily, weekly, monthly, or even yearly, everyone has goals they want to reach. Goals are a way of measuring our skill and differentiating between success and failure. I sort of did a half ass New Years Resolution blog and I sort of want to do it justice now.

Now that I live on my own I realize how much I want to accomplish in my spare time. I feel like no matter how much I do in a day I don't really do much towards my overall goals. For instance, I want to be finished Sky's Content before the start of my next term in school. The planning for Sky's Content suggests about 15 more chapters at least. I don't know if you noticed, but it sort of took me 3 years to write the first 15 chapters that are out now! (Well technically 16 if you count 11.5).

Not to mention I also want to write about 3 - 4 web applications I've been planning for a while now. One of them being re-doing EOE so that the system is a lot more automated. I.E. Sign up form that automatically populates the information into a database and then sends an e-mail to Angela and myself to approve.

But at the same time I really want to blog more and make this site to include you guys more. Like I said before, I'm not really sure how many people read my blog on a regular basis. I've been doing this for about 8 months now and I figured that I should really start trying to add to it.

I guess my resolution really is to do more. In 2009 all I did was write about 8 chapters of Sky's Content and set up EOE (sort of badly).

So in short, here is a list of my goals that I have currently set:

• Write at least 1000 words daily until Sky's Content is complete (not including editing days).
• Finish an old video game that I haven't played yet once every two weeks.
• Complete version 1 of at least one of my web applications by the end of this work term.
• Have the site redesigns done by the end of February.
• Blog at least twice a week.

Anymore and I'll tell you guys in future posts. In the meantime I'm off to finish my 1000 words for Sky's Content today. CIAO!

Third Person

The third person.

When I write my stories I always write in first person. Sky’s Content is in Yuri’s perspective and I’ve become so accustomed to thinking of things like: What does she know as a character? What do I know as an author? What details is she missing? etc. There are so many things that happen in the story that I know but is never told because Yuri never has any knowledge of it happening.

There’s also a lot of stuff that does happen but I never put because it doesn’t really fit into the flow of the story. BUT ANYWAYS.

So now I’m trying to write the second part of Sky’s Content in the third person and I’m really struggling. I’m so used to concentrating on her feelings and what’s happening to her in the moment I don’t really know how write where I have to explain other’s feelings as well. But at the same time I don’t really know how to write in third person grammatically. What sort of tenses am I suppose to use, and how I can write the story so that my own voice comes out. I don’t want to just write the story like it’s just saying what happens, I want to be able to say ‘this is what happens and this is how it affects each person.’

I know that I can just stick in the first person if I really wanted to, but there’s so much that happens outside of Yuri’s little bubble now that so much of the story would be lost. And I need to get comfortable in the third person anyways. For a lot of the story ideas I have the best way to write them is in third person.

It’s just sort of really frustrating because I feel a disconnect between what I’m writing down and what I want to say. It’s like I’m a two year old whose trying to talk and do it’s own thing but just physically can’t yet. x_X

BLAH.

My plan to fix this right now is to read a lot of books in the third person and just see how the style is written. At the same time I want to do some writing exercises to improve my grammar and the overall flow of my writing.

Let’s hope I can become more comfortable with third person because this is REALLY annoying.

BLLLLLLLAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Urgh, chores

So growing up my parents didn’t really make me do chores. I would do them sometimes out of boredom but really I didn’t do any ever. So now that I am living on my own I’ve come to the realization that after you eat spaghetti, the bowl, fork and cheese grater are dirty. And you need to clean them. Every time.

Now I know a lot of people are like ‘Karol that’s life, deal with it.’ But like, it sucks. Like I do it. But that doesn’t mean I enjoy it >=/

Anyways so I’m working as a web developer at a bank company and it’s pretty interesting. I always thought that web design/development is one of those things I would only like as a hobby and not as a job. But I was wrong, I rather enjoy the fact that I’m editing images and web pages just like I would on this web site. Although who knows, in 4 months I could hate it with all my soul.

*Can’t think of a good way to transition to next topic*

So I have a heater in my new room since it gets pretty cold in here. My parents brought it over yesterday and I thought the story behind it was pretty interesting. Turns out this heater is as old as I am. When I was born apparently I was yellow (For whatever reason, I knew there were complications when I was born. Don’t really know the details) and I had to be just in my diaper all day. But my room where I was in was cold, so my parents bought this heater so my little butt wouldn’t freeze off.

And now the same heater, almost 20 years later, is still keeping me warm,

Alright, that’s it for this blog. I got to go do some chores -_- BLEGH.